


Malaya

by StuffandFluff



Series: In Perfect Time [1]
Category: Figure Skating RPF, Olympics RPF, Real Person Fiction, Sports RPF
Genre: Break Up, Edited, F/M, Songfic, Zhenya coach change issue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-05
Updated: 2018-05-05
Packaged: 2019-05-02 12:54:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14545206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StuffandFluff/pseuds/StuffandFluff
Summary: Maybe I'll see you againWhen the sun rises, when the night passIf I won't pursue what's still not for meMaybe someday it'll returnYou're free now, Free





	Malaya

**Author's Note:**

> Malaya is a Filipino word which can be translated as free. It is also the title of a song composed and sung by Filipina singer/songwriter Moira Dela Torre.
> 
> It's been a crazy off season for this two (more on Zhenya). I hope that they'll surpass all of these obstacles and be stronger than ever! And as fans, let's support them!

**Pasensya na**

**Kung papatulugin na muna**

**Ang pusong napagod**

**Kakahintay**

**_(Forgive me_ **

**_If I'll let sleep_ **

**_My heart that's been tired_ **

**_Of waiting)_ **

  


_I don't know what will I do. It's not entirely his fault. But I feel that as long as I'm tied to him, my heart will just keep on hurting. It's been so long. I've waited long enough. I desperately yearn for him to acknowledge it, to show everyone what we are. I think I expected too much. Tonight, all will end here._

  


**Kaya sa natitirang**

**Segundong kayakap ka**

**Maaari bang magkunwaring**

**Akin ka pa**

**_(So in the remaining_ **

**_Seconds that I'm hugging you_ **

**_Can I pretend_ **

**_That you're still mine)_ **

  


_We are walking in one of the hidden spots in the Olympic Village, just enjoying the remaining moments we have here. We sat down in a vacant bench near the hills. From our spot we can see the bright lights that illuminate the whole village. This place really have a positive atmosphere._

 

“Are you cold?”

 

“Not really.”

 

_He still took off his jacket and draped it over my shoulders despite me telling him there's no need to. I will miss this. I will miss him._

 

“Zhenya?”

 

“Please, just… let me hug you.”

 

_That is the most bittersweet hug that I experienced._

  


**Mangangarap hanggang sa pagbalik**

**Mangangarap pa rin kahit masakit**

**_(I’ll keep dreaming until it came back_ **

**_I'll still dream even if it hurts)_ **

  


_As I return home, I have the memories that I had in PyeongChang in my heart. I'll keep it there hoping that maybe… Maybe._

  


**Baka sakali makita kitang muli**

**Pagsikat ng araw, paglipas ng gabi**

**Kundi pipilitin ang di pa para sa’kin**

**Baka sakaling maibalik**

**Malaya ka na, Malaya**

**_(Maybe I'll see you again_ **

**_When the sun rises, when the night pass_ **

**_If I won't pursue what's still not for me_ **

**_Maybe someday it'll return_ **

**_You're free now, Free)_ **

  


_We are always separated no matter what we do. We're pulled apart by the vast seas. He's deeply slumbering, I'm still eating my dinner. He's the heaven and I'm a mere sand. I should stop fooling myself. We will never be fit for each other. And even if we had a chance to finally train together, be in the same time zone, we'll still be far away from each other because this is not a perfect world. There will always be backlash when people see him with me. And I don't want them to hate him even for a second just because he's with me._

  


**Susuko na ang sandata**

**Aatras na sa laban**

**Di dahil naduduwag**

**Kundi dahil mahal kita**

**_(I'll throw away my weapon_ **

**_I'll give up the battle_ **

**_Not because I'm scared_ **

**_But because I love you)_ **

  


_26 missed calls. 13 unread messages. He also left some voice mail. Hours has passed since these messages. I ignored them so that I can think longer and I can calm my mind. Finally, I think I'm ready. I listened to his voice mails first._

 

**_“Zhenya, what's the matter? Why did you delete our pics in Instagram? Do we have a problem?”_ **

 

**_“Why are you not picking up? Let's talk, please.”_ **

 

**_I really want to hear your voice.”_ **

 

**_“Is it me not wanting to make our relationship public?”_ **

 

**_“Are you still angry because you didn't get the Olympic gold and I did?”_ **

 

**_“You're being selfish, Zhenya.”_ **

 

**_“If you want to talk, just call me.”_ **

  


_You don't understand Yuzu! I did this not because I want their attention and especially not because I'm angry with you winning what you aim for! It's because I love you. To the point that I'll take all the hate they’ll throw at you once they know about us. To the point that I'm willing to sacrifice what we had._

  


**Mahirap nang labanan**

**Mga espada ng orasan**

**Kung pipilitin pa**

**Lalo lang masasaktan**

**_(It's hard to fight_ **

**_The swords of a clock_ **

**_If we force this_ **

**_We'll only hurt more)_ **

  


_You have dreams and I also have mine. You want your quad axel. I want my redemption. And we have time against us. We're not kids anymore. We get older, our bodies get weaker. The only thing we get in our side is focus. I want you to reach your dream, much more than I want mine. So, I'm willing to let you go, to save for all the trouble you'll face if we continue this._

  


**Mangangarap hanggang sa pagbalik**

**Mangangarap pa rin kahit masakit**

**_(I’ll keep dreaming until it came back_ **

**_I'll still dream even if it hurts)_ **

  


_But what is this I'm feeling? It's like I'm waiting for you to say no, to tell that we'll make it through. Do I really want a break or I just want reassurance?_

  


**Baka sakali makita kitang muli**

**Pagsikat ng araw, paglipas ng gabi**

**Kundi pipilitin ang di pa para sa’kin**

**Baka sakaling maibalik**

**Malaya ka na**

**_(Maybe I'll see you again_ **

**_When the sun rises, when the night pass_ **

**_If I won't pursue what's still not for me_ **

**_Maybe someday it'll return_ **

**_You're free now)_ **

  


_My thumb hovered over the send button. I've been reading the words that I typed over and over again. But each time my resolve gets weaker. No, I need to be strong. We need this._

 

**_“Yuzu, let's end this.”_ **

  
  
  
  
**Malaya**


End file.
